Wow

You know what would be awesome…if instead of getting your period and bleeding for 4-7 days, confetti shot out of your vagina with a little banner that said “Congratulations! You’re not pregnant!” That’d be a lot more convenient and to the point. Of course it would put the tampon and sanitary napkin industires out of business…but women would be less cranky and we could do it more often…except sometimes it’s a good excuse not to do it…the best would be if it suddenly changed over to confetti and banner and all of woman-kind kept it a secret from men…that’d be sweet…but there’s always those freaks who are into it…I’m specifically thinking of an episode of Californication…but I think if the girl wasn’t into it the guy would relent pretty easily or least feel he had no choice…but who am I kidding if the ideal scenario were true, even if it were supposedly my period I’d do it with Duchovny…and actually I wouldn’t even lie…why would I deny the Duchov?...but present circumstances in tact…it’d be an asnwer to my prayers if I was on the rag, met Duchovny, and he was totally into that…fuck yes…and if he said he wasn’t I’d say…”But Hank Moody is, consider it a character study. You can swim in the red sea just don’t drink the water…don’t worry about it!” Hopefully he’d go for that…p.s. shout out to D. K. for that bit of wisdom and also to B. F. for sharing it with me, even as a member of the female persuasion…